remember when you were unstoppable

I had a less-than-great weekend, 2 blind-making migraines and extending a kindness that got me a serious kick in the ass. The good part of the weekend = these tiny prizes in the mail & some progress made on the house. I was 14 when Weetzie Bat was released, so I’ve grown up with these books and reading them now is as comforting as when I was a teenager. They make my bitter and cynical years drop away and I can feel that magic indomitability, the endless possibility that I felt as a teenager. Fail-less destiny!! The only times I feel that now are 1. listening to certain 80s songs and 2. reading the books I loved then. At 36 that invincible teen is long gone, and I’m careening toward 40 having no idea what I want to do! What makes that feeling of unstoppability stop? It’s so good, so magical, so inspiring. I want to clutch at it and keep it forever.  Thank you, Francesca Lia Block, for keeping it up all these years.

Do you know what I mean? Is it just that grown-up dreams are nowhere near as fun as teenage dreams?

11 Comments

  1. it can be that way again, i promise.
    once in the same mindset, i wrote a list of all my passions (i was in a horrid job). next to my list i added how i could follow my passions and create a business out of them. happy to say i am doing them all and life is filled with possibilities and twisting paths that can lead to “who knows where”
    wishing you your dreams
    debra

  2. I too love the Weetzie Bat books. Those concepts of magic and meaning in symbols and people really shaped how I grew up. Loving things so unashamed. I still tell people that their pain is like roses, that was one of the most important lessons in my life.

  3. If it’s any consolation I’d rather have grown-up dreams than teenage ones – as a teen I was basically powerless to bring any of my dreams into fruition. Now, that I have time and an income and no-one telling me what to do, oh and The Internet, dreams are much easier to make reality, or near enough to!

  4. I adore reading your blog, but have never posted. I felt I had to do so today, because I have been comfort reading the Weetzie Bat books so the magic in them can get me through a hard place. Maybe we can’t get that superhero feeling of unstoppability back, but I appreciate the little magics all the more when I find them. And that’s something that I often find in your blog and writing. So, thank you.

  5. Ha! I’ve been having this conversation over and over with (mostly) myself and other people. I think a lot of us young women have felt this way at some points in our lives. At this point, I do believe anything is possible, but how crazy do I want to drive myself to make it happen?

    I thought I was doing a good job appreciating what I already had, but I think I need to get better at it

    The end of winter is always the most depressing in New England :)

    1. I really do need to think about how much this weather is getting to me! In Berkeley right now the cherry blossoms are blooming and the birds are singing!! I can’t wait for green buds and picnics in the garden. I’m sure it will help rekindle the hope!

  6. Yes. I have this feeling also. It’s funny because the drive is there, the dreams are there, and the excitement and yearning are there, but then there is also this adult, sensible, smothering voice that puts a damp cloud of restraint over you. I am trying desperately to break through it, but it is hard.

  7. Just finished “Pink Smog”, and how appropriate these words were:

    “No matter how bad things get, you can always see the beauty in them. The worse things get, the more you have to make yourself see the magic in order to survive.”

Leave a Reply